Don't eat this chocolate cake

The Okla­homa Legislature’s rul­ing to allow a pri­vately funded statue of the Ten Com­mand­ments to be erected in 2012 at the state’s Capi­tol has paved the way for another reli­gious group to pro­pose their own mon­u­ment. The New York-based Satanic Tem­ple has for­mally sub­mit­ted plans and the design of a seven-foot statue of Satan that it wants dis­played next to the Ten Com­mand­ments mon­u­ment. Aside from appear­ing as a piece of art depict­ing a goat-headed fig­ure with horns, wings and a long beard, the statue will also serve as a chair “where peo­ple of all ages may sit on the lap of Satan for inspi­ra­tion and con­tem­pla­tion,” accord­ing to tem­ple spokesman Lucien Greaves.  Rep­re­sen­ta­tive Don Armes said, “I think we need to be tol­er­ant of peo­ple who think dif­fer­ent than us, but this is Okla­homa, and that’s not going to fly here.”

A Ten­nessee man who lost his pet rac­coon after a video of him show­er­ing with his other rac­coon went viral on YouTube is run­ning for gov­er­nor in order to get back his faith­ful com­pan­ion. Mark “Coon­rippy” Brown will take on Gov­er­nor Bill Haslam in the Repub­li­can pri­mary this August in a bid that he hopes will get Rebekah away from state wildlife offi­cials. “This is all about the rac­coon,” Brown said.The 55-year-old claims that a per­mit request he sent to Ten­nessee Wildlife Resources Agency offi­cials went unan­swered adding, “We live in the United States of the Offended — not the United States of America.”

poop cakeBe care­ful when you want your cake and to eat it too.  The owner of Oh Cakes in Inver­cargill, New Zealand Emma McDon­ald, sent an offen­sive cake to the engage­ment party of 24-year-old Micaela Har­ris fol­low­ing a dis­pute about sched­ul­ing and money.  Accord­ing to McDon­ald, she reduced a $50 voucher the cus­tomer had won for a cake down to $30 because the cus­tomer already owed her $20. After the cake was picked up, McDon­ald posted about it on Face­book. “You left with a $30 voucher and you still want a cake?  OK cool — give me some ideas? Oh wait you have none apart from want­ing choco­late. I have a bril­liant idea for your cake!!! — So here it is your turd cake! Hope you learn your les­son.”  Along with the choco­late “log” cake she sent along a note that read “Eat ****!”  Har­ris was forced to order a new cake from another baker and McDon­ald has no regrets.

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