Friday 1/13

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Urine a cab - A Florida man was arrested for call­ing 911 to claim he’d been kid­napped by a cab­bie.  Appar­ently, Paul Coombs was ram­bling inco­her­ently and smelled strongly of urine, so the cab­bie drove him back to the cab depot where he was picked up — prompt­ing Coombs to dial the emer­gency num­ber and insist he was being kid­napped.  Coombs ended up set­tling his fare, but wanted to set­tle the score — so he dialed 911 seven more times to report the “crime.” When he was warned that more calls could lead to an arrest, he said he had a check­book and didn’t care about going to jail — which is exactly where he ended up.

Sugar High - Life’s not so sweet for a Mis­souri woman who’s fac­ing drug charges after call­ing cops to com­plain that she’d paid 40 bucks for some crack cocaine — only to find she’d been sold a bag of sugar instead.  Suzanne Basham called 911 to offer up the address of the guys who tried to give her a sugar high, but they refused to allow inves­ti­ga­tors inside. When cops went to Basham’s home, they found her to be in pos­ses­sion of a crack pipe — a crime in itself.  She already has one drug bust on her record.

Waste not want to go to jail — A rou­tine traf­fic stop in Flori­daturned into a high-speed chase after the dopey dri­ver decided to make a run for it — in order to smoke all the crack he had in his pos­ses­sion before pulling over.  Gainesville cops wanted to issue Ken­neth Stine a cita­tion for dri­ving with a burned-out head­light, but he decided to burn rub­ber, say­ing that he’d just pur­chased some crack cocaine and didn’t want to see it go to waste after an arrest. He was charged with flee­ing and attempt­ing to elude, pos­ses­sion of drug para­pher­na­lia and vio­lat­ing his pro­ba­tion from a 2010 drug case.

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