Pretzel Beatdown

pretzelTwo Detroit women were busted on assault charges after they got all twisted over being given the wrong dip­ping sauce at a mall pret­zel stand. The women, whose names were not released, attacked the server at an Aun­tie Anne’s loca­tion after return­ing mid­way through their snack to demand dif­fer­ent dips. The server refused to exchange the dips, since they’d already eaten most if it! That’s when the gals decided to repeat their demand — this time with their fists, jump­ing over the counter to deliver a honey of a beat down to the worker, who mus­tered no counter attack. Charges are still pending.

In what has to be one of the world’s weird­est car crashes, a speed­ing SUV flew off a Hous­ton road, hit a berm that sent it air­borne, smashed into the roof of a house, then lodged in the roof of the house next-door—all with­out hurt­ing any­one. Police think the dri­ver was drunk and speed­ing when he took a curve that was too much to han­dle. But nei­ther the dri­ver nor the houses’ inhab­i­tants were harmed, and indeed, when taken away in an ambu­lance, the dri­ver appeared to be tex­ting. The curve is appar­ently a known treach­er­ous spot, with one local cit­ing acci­dents “two or three times a month.” But “I’ve been out here a while and, yes, this is the first I’ve seen any­thing like this,” says a police deputy. But the dri­ver is fac­ing pos­si­ble charges, includ­ing those stem­ming from a gun that tum­bled out of the vehi­cle; he could face trou­ble for hav­ing a pis­tol while dri­ving drunk.

When deputies pulled Heather Gard­ner over Cops said Gardner’s eyes were blood­shot and she reeked of alco­hol when she got out. She declined a sobri­ety test by say­ing, “What’s the point, I’m drunk. I don’t drink and drive often — oth­er­wise I’d be good at it.” The 27-year-old told them she knew she shouldn’t be behind the wheel, but defended her deci­sion to hit the road by say­ing, “You don’t under­stand, I just want to cud­dle.”  Police said as she was released, Gard­ner was sur­prised that she’d hit another car and asked police how she got out of her vehicle.

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