A baby daiquiri

A Virginia man is grumpy because someone went into his yard when he was sleepy – and stole one of the Seven Dwarfs figures he keeps there for decoration. Ron Waterman says he spent nine months cleaning, repairing and repainting the concrete lawn ornaments before placing them out – but just a few days later, someone sneaky and stealthy came around and made off with the statue of Bashful, along with the dwarf house at the center of the display. He figures the act was committed by a group, since the house alone weighed in at 400 pounds. Waterman has left the remaining six dwarfs in the yard, along with a sign that reads: “Please return my dwarf. No questions asked. If I find it on your property, I will call the law.”

pregnant woman with a gunNew Orleans cops are looking for a woman who was thirsty enough to pull a gun in order to steal a frozen drink from a bar – which is understandable, since witnesses say she looked to be pregnant. The woman walked into a tavern on famed Bourbon Street and helped herself to a daiquiri when the bartender wasn’t looking. When he caught a glimpse of what she doing and went over to confront her, she pulled out the weapon and threatened to shoot him before walking out sipping her pinched punch. That’s one way to cure morning sickness.

 A British man has some jail time on tap after he broke into a pub in the middle of the night to have a couple of rounds – then fell asleep after knocking back one too many. Adam Bell let himself into the tavern after closing time and started helping himself to some beer directly from the tap. The brew proved to be way too powerful for him and when the proprietor walked in the next morning he found Bell passed out on the floor. So he called the cops. Bell had also busted into the pool table to steal the change inside, and was charged with several counts of burglary.

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