Darth, you are my leader

A fresh face on the political scene in Ukraine is hoping the country will be open to embracing the power darth for presidentof the dark side. Darth Vader has announced he is running for the presidency of Ukraine as a candidate for the Ukrainian Internet Party. “I alone can make an empire out of a republic, to restore former glory, to return lost territories and pride for this country,” Vader said in a statement released by the UIP. The party, founded by Dmitry Golubov, is looking to eliminate the use of paper and create a “government by Internet.” The party was officially registered in 2010 & Vader won three percent of the votes in 2012 parliamentary elections.

When a Michigan man went to use the loo at the Pittsfield Township Department of Public Safety building on a Sunday, a firefighter noticed that he looked a little intoxicated. After determining the man had driven to the building, police officers were called in to perform sobriety tests and unsurprisingly he failed. The Livonia man was taken to jail to sober up and the Washtenaw County Prosecutor’s Office will likely charge him with operating while intoxicated.  That’s what he gets for opening the flood gates!

Don’t steal a man’s underware or you might get the ax!! According to documents filed in Pierce County Superior Court, the alleged victim was outside his home when Daniel Urton asked if he had his cars
keys. The neighbor told Urton he didn’t know what he was talking about and the man began walking towards him with an ax. “I am going to cut your “berries” off,” Urton said. “I’m going to kill you.”  When Pierce County Sheriff’s Office deputies arrived after the victim called 911, they found Urton in the
street with his sister. After Urton was arrested, he reportedly told police that the “victim had his car keys, was stealing his underwear and was hiding secret cameras inside his home.” He was asked why
he was approaching his neighbor with the ax. Urton responded, “I was going to cut his “berries” off.”  Urton was charged with harassment.  His sister told police he “was not a mean person if he took his

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