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Using the word as a weapon - A Florida woman gave a whole new mean­ing to Bible Belt last week by assault­ing her son’s girl­friend with a copy of the good book!  The younger woman told deputies she had been argu­ing with her boyfriend’s mother when the woman picked up a Bible and threw it at her, hit­ting her in the eye and open­ing up a good-sized gash. The woman insists she acci­den­tally hit the younger gal when she swung the book in an effort to make her “get out of her face” with a cam­era phone. The son, ignored that whole “honor thy mother” thing, said he saw his mom toss a Bible from 10– to-15 feet away, strik­ing his gal pal in the face.

They made it look big - A Dutch man raised sus­pi­cions of fel­low pas­sen­gers in an air­port because he appeared unusu­ally fid­gety, prompt­ing a search that revealed not ants in his pants but hum­ming birds!!  There were more than a dozen indi­vid­u­ally wrapped LIVE birds in cloth pouches in his trousers. The man, who has a prior record of ani­mal smug­gling, was arrested.

Los­ing before it begins - An Indi­ana teenager, Zachary Keil­man showed up at the sta­tion in Low­ell, Indi­ana and announced that he was pretty sure there was a war­rant out for his arrest. He came to this con­clu­sion because he’d just escaped from a deputy’s car after being detained for under­age drink­ing — and had a friend cut through the cuffs to make his get­away a lit­tle eas­ier. His per­fect crime was marred by one small prob­lem, though: He left his iden­ti­fi­ca­tion in the back seat of the police cruiser.