Freak News for Wednesday 10/19

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Knee Jerk reaction – An Arizona man is asking for a real tongue-lashing after cops picked him up on charges of approaching a woman who’d fallen on the street.  MartinSolo didn’t have plans to hurt the woman but didn’t really help the situation either.  He was busted after the unidentified woman tripped over a stair, only to have him leap on her and start licking her knee! He allegedly tried to move up and give her face the same treatment, but she managed to fight him off.  A police source said the woman was pressing charges, but it was not immediately clear what those might be.

Not the knight in shining armour she’d hoped for – A father in Washington state showed his commitment to really old-fashioned discipline — when he punished his teen daughter by forcing her to don a suit of armor, then smacked her with a wooden sword.  Freemon Edward Seay, described as a renaissance enthusiast, did play fair, giving the girl a sword of her own, but he has still been charged with assault with a deadly weapon. He told cops he had a right to discipline the teen because she’d gone to a crack house the night before — which she denied.  The girl suffered some serious bruises, and the 300-pound Seay has been ordered not to have any contact with her until his trial.

What a piz-za work! –A Kentucky man was arrested on drunk driving charges after he drove his car into a ditch, then informed cops that he’d only had “two pizzas to drink” before the accident.  Donn Adams gave the cheesy reply after deputies asked him about his apparently disoriented behavior. WhileAdams denied being under the influence of any substance, police searching his car found two syringes and a vial containing what appeared to be heroin.

Unknown source