Freak News for Wednesday, 9/7

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THE PUFFS ARE MIGHTIER THAN THE SWORD – Cops in Illinois arrested a man who was blocking highway traffic while carrying a sword — and shouting that he was “cuckoo for Cocoa Puffs.” The still-unidentified man was reportedly “marching like a drum major” down Highway 30 when cops approached him. He swung his weapon once, but dropped it when ordered to – although he did try to escape by jumping into a car that had swerved off the road to avoid the whole bizarre scene. The suspect has been charged with attempted carjacking, resisting law enforcement and possession of marijuana.

SHIRT HAPPENS – When Justin Caine was pulled over for a minor traffic violation in Florida, the deputy who stopped him noticed a marijuana leaf on his shirt – and not a picture of the wacky weed, an actual piece of skunky greenery. Upon closer inspection, Caine was found to have a large bag of pot in his pocket. In fact, a large enough bag to prompt felony charges.

JENNY CRAIG MADE ME DO IT! – A Florida woman who was arrested for dropping her pants and relieving herself at a picnic area blamed the incident on a flat belly, rather than a full bladder. The woman, who was unsteady on her feet when cops arrived at the scene, says that her pants fell down on their own because she’d recently lost weight – and she was having a bit of trouble keeping them attached to her hips. A man who was at the park with his children begged to differ, saying he saw the woman pull her pants down on her own. He also noted that there were bathrooms nearby.

Unknown source