Friday 3/02

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Suspicious package – Before sunrise yesterday Northern Ireland police say a passing patrol spotted a young man wrestling to free him self from a house’s front door. Apparently, he had tried to reach the door’s inner lock via the letterbox flap but his arm got stuck!  Firefighters dismantled the door but left the letterbox clamped to the boy’s arm until they reached a police station, where it was safely removed.

Sloppy seconds – 19 year old University ofGeorgia student Carli Shultis was hungry.  Hungry enough she stole some hashbrowns from the campus eatery even though she had money to pay for them.  She also stuck them in her pants.  According to reports, when a food service worker spotted her in the act, she quickly removed the spuds from her pants and attempted to put them back on the food counter!  She has been banned from 12 University eateries for a year and charged with theft by shoplifting.

I’m drunk, so shoot me – 19 year-old Jessalyn Stierwalt was drinking with two male friends and she really needed some extra time to “sober up” for her probation meeting the next morning. So, she asked her pals to do her a solid and stab her in the stomach and shoulder.  Stierwalt’s plan did have some sobering results — after being treated at the hospital she was arrested and charged with conspiracy to commit second-degree assault and a weapon offense. The friends who stabbed her were charged with second degree assault and use of a weapon to commit a felony.

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