Friday 5/11

Audio clip: Adobe Flash Player (ver­sion 9 or above) is required to play this audio clip. Down­load the lat­est ver­sion here. You also need to have JavaScript enabled in your browser.

A Cana­dian man is lick­ing his wounds, rather than his fin­gers, after cops busted him on a dis­tracted dri­ving charge — because he was dri­ving his car hands-free … while eat­ing a rotis­serie chicken. A cop spot­ted Michael Gib­son dri­ving errat­i­cally and noticed that he was using his knees to steer, while pay­ing more atten­tion to the bowl of chicken sit­ting in his lap. While the 58-year-old admit­ted that he may have drifted between lanes a cou­ple of times, he insisted it was not because he was dis­tracted by his lunch.  Gib­son racked up a total of $460 in fines for the inci­dent, so it sounds like Cana­dian cops see eat­ing the bird as even more frowned upon than flip­ping the bird.

A clerk in a Russ­ian liquor store foiled a rob­bery by ask­ing the wannabe thief to pro­duce some ID before she turned over the booze — which he couldn’t do, because he was only 16. The teen was wav­ing a machete and demand­ing liquor and cig­a­rettes, but the law-abiding clerk wouldn’t budge from her posi­tion that he was too young to obtain the mer­chan­dise — bought or stolen. She even­tu­ally gave in after being threat­ened with the weapon, but held out long enough that cops were able to arrest the kid very near the store.

Inves­ti­ga­tors said a bar bouncer, whose ID was reported stolen in Feb­ru­ary, called Iowa City police at Sat­ur­day and reported Uni­ver­sity of Iowa stu­dent Steven Fiorella, 19, had handed him HIS stolen ID and attempted to pass it off as his own!  Police said Fiorella, who was also in pos­ses­sion of the bouncer’s debit card and AAA card, told offi­cers he pur­chased the items at a party for $20.Fiorella was arrested on charges of fifth-degree theft and unlaw­ful use of
another’s ID.

Unknown source