Hamburgler turns out to be just ham

A Florida man showed just how dumb a smart-phone can be after he was charged with several felonies – for taking part in the theft of a truck –then bragging about the crime by texting a picture of it to his pals.  Billy Ray Southard texted friends with a picture of a 1995 GMC truck captioned with the message: “Look what I just picked up.” This drew some attention, since the vehicle had been reported stolen just a short time earlier. Cops went to the home where Southard lives with his parents and found the vehicle, which had its plates and VIN number changed in an effort to disguise it. According to police, Southard admitted his participation in the thefts after he was arrested.

North Charleston police say a 54-year-old woman, whose name was not released, argued with a 64-year-old man because he wouldn’t stop playing Eagles tunes. Police said the woman then armed herself with a kitchen knife and attacked the man, her former boyfriend, causing injuries including lacerations to his arm, elbow and hand. Investigators said the man and a friend were able to restrain the woman, but she got away and retrieved another knife, which she used to resume the attack. The police report said “all parties involved were intoxicated.” The woman was arrested on a charge of criminal domestic violence of a high and aggravated nature. Well, you know what they say “You can check-out any time you like, but you can never leave!”

hamburglerMove over, Hamburgler*, you’ve just been outdone! Felix Becerra who punched out for the day as the manager of a California McDonald’s, then returned to rob the restaurant at gunpoint covered his face with a white mask during the stick-up, in which he forced three employees to open a safe, then herded them into a freezer, warning them not to come out for 30 minutes. Though he managed to get away with that heist, Becerra got busted when he went back for a refill at another Mickey D’s, where an employee gave the same description as in the first — and got a look at his car as well.  Cops apprehended Becerra and, after some grilling, found the cash and a toy gun in his vehicle. *man in picture is not, in fact, the real Hamburgler.  Nor is he F. Becerra.  However, he looks just as ridiculous as we could imagine.

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