Hey batter batter!

Ronald Strong exhib­ited some weak bowel con­trol mid­way through his visit in a fed­eral cour­t­house, and had to be escorted to the men’s room by a bailiff. He stripped down and cleaned him­self up, but when a cop entered the loo a few min­utes later, he reported that “75 per­cent of it was cov­ered!”  A 57-page court doc­u­ment included pic­tures and “vivid com­par­isons to spaghetti with meat sauce and chunky peanut butter.”

Baseball bat 2Here’s a story that’s both feel-good and hor­ri­fy­ing in equal mea­sures. A Bal­ti­more man was shot twice when two armed rob­bers broke into his apart­ment early yes­ter­day morn­ing. Did he col­lapse? Beg for help? Make a run for it? Nope. Despite his wounds, Ken­neth Cox, 24, picked up what police say was a “blunt object” and smacked his attacker in the head with it—killing him instantly. Cox is now in a sta­ble con­di­tion in hos­pi­tal, while cops are still search­ing for the sec­ond rob­ber, who did make a run for it.

Der­rick Mosely walked into Dis­count Gun Sales with a base­ball bat with the plan to bust up and steal some items from a glass dis­play case.  Unbe­knownst to Mosely the man­ager was pack­ing a loaded gun which he promptly pulled out.  Mosely dropped the bat and was hauled away on charges of first-degree rob­bery, first-degree theft, unlaw­ful pos­ses­sion of a firearm and second-degree crim­i­nal mischief.

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