Pineapple pileup

A Jersey City, NJ, warehouse worker somehow survived—and never even lost consciousness—after being buried by 1,500 pounds of
pineapples yesterday. The 39-year-old was in stable condition last night, the Star-Ledger reports. Other than calling it an “industrial
accident,” the paper had no further details on what caused the pineapples to fall.

 Scott Simon, unintentionally dialed 911 while still frothing with rage over a late-night dispute at a Waffle House in Florida. In the recording, Simon is heard saying that he intends to follow the man he was arguing with to his house and shoot him. That man, Nicholas Walker, was indeed shot and killed mere minutes later, while he was pulling his car onto I-95. Simon was arrested, and while police don’t think he actually killed Walker, he’s been charged with first-degree murder because they believe he orchestrated the hit. “This is a first for me,” a police spokesman said. “Criminals say crazy things all the time, but I’ve never seen anyone call a recorded line.”

Store employee Kristie Asplin says a woman whose name was not released, kept asking her to go to the storeroom to retrieve items she had on layaway, and when Asplin finally agreed, the gal made a break for it. Asplin says that she gave chase because “adrenalin kicked in” when she saw that a $500 bag was missing. As she was in pursuit, she watched as the thief’s jeans fell to the ground – revealing that she’d gone commando that day and of course dropping the thief to tfreeze-dried-pineappleshe ground.   

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