Running baaaare...

Run­ning baaaare down the side­walk.…
Two bor­der patrol agents in Ari­zona are under inves­ti­ga­tion for com­ing up with their own sen­tence for a group of drug smug­glers. Agents Dario Castillo and Ramon Zuniga are being inves­ti­gated on civil rights vio­la­tions for their actions, which pros­e­cu­tors say were par­tic­u­larly dan­ger­ous because the men were forced to flee naked in nearly freez­ing desert tem­per­a­tures while highas kites beca­cause the agents made them eat all the dope. They prob­a­bly didn’t feel any­thing any­way! The agents also set fire to the alleged smug­glers’ belong­ings to cover up the incident.

Now, that’s some HOT lin­gerie!
A woman in upstate New York got hot under the col­lar after being banned from a Victoria’s Secret store for shoplift­ing, so she decided to heat things up for the store man­ager. Lau­ren Jack­son ruined more than 60 thongs, biki­nis and hip-huggers caus­ing nearly $750 in dam­ages by pour­ing a vat of chili over a rack of under­wear! She might have got­ten away with it, but she decided to return to the scene of the crime, where an employee remem­bered her and called cops. She faces charges of third-degree crim­i­nal mis­chief, which is a five-alarm felony in New York state.

Get­ting an “F” in com­mon sense
An Eng­lish teacher in Aus­tralia was granted $17,000 in wrong­ful dis­missal charges after he was fired for using a work­sheet that used the F-bomb in every sen­tence. Luke Web­ster was teach­ing stu­dents whose first lan­guage was not Eng­lish when he offered up the test, ask­ing them to dis­cuss the four-letter word’s var­i­ous mean­ings, and whether it was being used as a verb or a noun. He was fired for “highly offen­sive actions,” but a court ruled that he was … shall, we say, “screwed” by admin­is­tra­tors who didn’t give him a chance to explain his reasoning.

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