Smoke free, yes. Free to live, no.

758737-prisoner-smokingEtta Mae Lopez wanted to quit smok­ing, so she did the usual: waited patiently out­side a sheriff’s office until a deputy came out and then slapped him across the face. And, ta-da, now she’s in a smoke-free jail for 63 days! The 31-year-old Cal­i­forn­ian explained to the con­fused deputy that she wanted to get locked up to kick the habit, so she pleaded no con­test to a charge of mis­de­meanor bat­tery of a peace offi­cer. She fig­ured “that the only way to quit smok­ing was to go to jail because they don’t allow tobacco in the jail.”

These sus­pects are accused of run­ning a pros­ti­tu­tion ring out of their apart­ments, using cocaine and pass­ing out in the halls. The build­ing in ques­tion? It’s a senior cit­i­zen hous­ing com­plex in New Jer­sey, and the two main sus­pects who were arrested after a drug and pros­ti­tu­tion sting are 75 and 66 years old! James Parham and neigh­bor Cheryl Chaney are sus­pected of being behind the recent increase in crime; a third sus­pect, 54, was also arrested on drug charges. Res­i­dents started com­plain­ing many were scared to leave their apart­ments. An under­cover inves­ti­ga­tion and police sur­veil­lance ulti­mately led to Parham and Chaney—who are, not sur­pris­ingly, being evicted.

 A Florida man was bowl­ing at Jupiter Lanes at 7:30 p.m. one evening when he incurred a gun­shot wound to his leg! Wit­nesses said the man was car­ry­ing a revolver in the pocket of his shorts and the weapon fired off a round when he struck him­self in the leg with his bowl­ing ball. That’s right…bowling with a loaded revolver in his pants pocket! The man’s injuries were not con­sid­ered life-threatening, but he was taken to St. Mary’s Med­ical Cen­ter as a pre­cau­tion, police said. 

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