Tuesday 11/13


A Florida woman, whose name was not released, called cops to report a theft, say­ing that she’d placed about $3000 into a packet of alu­minum foil and slipped it in between two trays of bis­cuits in her oven for safe keep­ing – but when she returned home, she found that some­one had made off with about a third of the stash, then re-arranged the remain­ing bills care­fully. The picky crook also snatched a few items of cloth­ing and three jars of pizza sauce, but for some rea­son, left a fresh con­tainer of salsa near the woman’s front door.

An Indi­anapo­lis man was not too happy about a pizza deliv­ery he got –not because it was a bad pizza but because the deliv­ery was made by a drunk who crashed his car into the house.  The uniden­ti­fied home­owner says that he heard the gun­ning of a car engine and felt his house shake, then walked to the front of the house to see William Kise sit­ting in the driver’s seat of his Ford Mus­tang, crashed through the house, hold­ing a slice of pizza. In an effort to be polite, Kise got out of the car and offered to share his din­ner –but the home­owner opted to order up a slice of jus­tice, call­ing cops to the scene. Kise, who admit­ted to hav­ing five beers before the acci­dent, says that his foot became stuck on the gas pedal as he opened the box to break into the pie. He was charged with DUI and reck­less driving.

An Ohio man set a record of sorts when he man­aged to get arrested twice – at the exact same time. Thanks to Day­light Sav­ings Time, Niles Gam­mons’ arrest record now includes two entries for dif­fer­ent crimes, both dated Novem­ber 4th at 1:08 a.m. Gam­mons was ini­tially stopped for dri­ving the wrong way down a one-way street and cited for dri­ving under the influ­ence, after offi­cers noted a strong smell of alco­hol and found a small amount of mar­i­juana on him. He was issued a sum­mons and sent on his way, but shortly after clocks were turned back, he was clocked again – this time for back­ing his car into a police cruiser.

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