Tuesday 1/3

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Para­noid much? - Author­i­ties in Florida said a man who awoke to the sound of his dog bark­ing grabbed Bond Arms Snake Slayer .410 shotshell/.45 Colt der­ringer from beneath his pil­low and acci­den­tally shot him­self in the arm!  When you’re star­tled awake is not the time to make assump­tions!  He was taken to Hal­i­fax Health Med­ical Cen­ter in Day­tona Beach by EVAC ambu­lance for treat­ment.  No word on what the dog was bark­ing at. 

Naked lunch — An Illi­nois cou­ple faces get­ting their buns toasted after they zipped into a fast-food drive thru to place an order — while both of them were buck naked. Paul Kosur and Megan Gui­ter­rez stripped down pretty far before they even reached the Gales­burg McDonald’s — the only cloth­ing items found in their car were a coat and one pair of pants that Kosur was try­ing to pull on when cops arrived.  The pair kept their senses of humor: Even after being booked on inde­cency charges, they told offi­cers they still thought the stunt was hilarious.

I’m not chicken! - A Florida man who was busted as part of a cock-fighting ring three years ago lost a game of chicken with author­i­ties when he was arrested pick­ing up a live rooster at the post office last week. Danny Pham pleaded igno­rance, say­ing he was only trans­port­ing the bird for a friend. In the ear­lier bust, he insisted he didn’t know there was a cock­fight at his home, despite the fact that there were more than 80 roost­ers caged up in his back­yard. Since he’d been banned from pos­sess­ing any ani­mals, Pham was arrested for vio­lat­ing his probation.

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