Tuesday 2/14

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Thank you, now go away – An Indiana man put in a bid for the title of world’s most polite burglar when he broke into a woman’s home and began folding her laundry before cooking dinner. Ashley Murray says she came home to find Keith Davis in her kitchen, hovering over the stove sautéing a pan of chicken and onions. She’d also found he’d done chores and decked out the sofa with a sheet and pillowcases. When cops responded to her call,Davis insisted he was in his own home, and the woman was actually the one trespassing — but the deputies didn’t buy the excuse.Murray isn’t sure about pressing charges, since, as she puts it, “He drunk up my orange juice, but it’s cool because he swept up my floor and folded my clothes.”

X-rated Smurfing – An Ogden, UT man had rented a copy of “The Smurfs” from a Redbox kiosk and loaded the disc into his laptop to show some kids. But when he turned the projector on for the children, pornographic images flashed on the screen. Authorities got involved when the father complained somebody had tampered with the DVD. Police found nothing wrong, saying the porn was probably on the laptop.

Silent-but-deadly – Wayne Hadley Jr. was arrested at his home on suspicion of making a bomb threat — delivered by writing the word “bomb” on a roll of toilet paper. But Hadley’s aunt said the young man was pondering an explosion of another kind, telling investigators, “He was in the restroom doodling on some toilet paper and I am going to just let modesty go and tell you we are from the country, and so he calls passing gas ‘bombs.'”

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