Wednesday 6/20

Cops in Swe­den were called to res­cue a woman spot­ted lying with her arm draped over the bal­cony of a high-rise apart­ment. After receiv­ing an emer­gency call, first respon­ders knocked on the apart­ment door and, find­ing no response, forced their way in. Upon arrival, they headed to the ter­race where they found the man­nequin lying splayed out and much the worse for wear.

A New Jer­sey man was inter­cepted by author­i­ties after he com­pleted one too many calls to 911 — all of them claim­ing that he was Pres­i­dent Obama look­ing to speak to Tim Tebow. Jason Slater called the emer­gency line look­ing for the quar­ter­back, and after being told to take a hike, he made a call to his local precinct with the same request. When offi­cers traced the call, they headed to Slater’s fam­ily home, where they found him hid­ing under blan­kets in his mother’s bed­room closet.

The man who was in the area work­ing on a con­struc­tion job, attempted to boost an arm­ful of goods from the local Wal­mart, includ­ing blue jeans and ear buds, but store per­son­nel & we sup­pose karma stopped him in the act. He fled the scene and hopped into his truck, but before he’d gone too far, the muf­fler came loose, and he stepped out to fix it — only to have the truck roll for­ward and over him!  Wal-Mart has opted not to press charges, but the uni­verse has other ideas: the man is in “extremely seri­ous” con­di­tion at a nearby hospital.

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